Follow Your Passion

This is the worst advice I have ever received. And I’ve found that a lot of people in their mid to late 20’s feel the same way. 

Since the first day of college, passion was the law of the land. We were told to “Read!”, “Learn!”, “Explore!”.  We had four years to run after what we found most inspiring. It sounds easy enough, doesn’t it? A four year paradise of space and time to think. The reality, however, is much of the opposite. 

I found 20% of my friends ignoring the advice all together, for a whole host of reasons which included but were not limited to: financial obligations, overbearing parents, or simply, peer pressure. These students usually majored in marketable degrees (i.e. engineering, finance, biology.) 

10% of my friends took the easiest route - well aware that college would be a once in a lifetime opportunity that they did not want to squander away to pressure. These friends majored in “easy A” classes and spent most of their time traveling or getting to know fellow classmates. They had little direction but embraced the chaos and blurriness. 

The bulk of my friends, the mass 70%, wandered aimlessly trying to “follow their passion.” Some days they went with the herd, and others, they spent on grassy knolls, tanning…ignoring the glaring lack of direction. 

These friends are still struggling. Most hate their jobs, others have taken risks and failed, and even more are still confused. 

What I wish someone had told them that sunny afternoon, on Convocation Day, was how to follow your passion. What is the difference between work and a hobby? Is there such a thing as incorporating both? Can you really love what you do and still make money? How can you ensure your family will have the choices you didn’t? Is failure a step closer to unlocking that treasure? 

The reality is, most people chase a pot of gold without realizing it doesn’t exist. What we should have been told is that following your passion is really about finding it. Its about losing your predetermined track, getting frustrated, and breaking through a status quo. I studied english, technology, and political science. I worked in finance, tech, and media. I kept at it until I realized I was searching for something that didn’t exist. I loved and hated aspects of all my majors - of all my jobs - but realized one particular industry encapsulated the love and hate beautifully: venture. And still within venture, there are spaces I understand better than others.

The battle really never ends.

The advice that has resonated most with me over the years is to work on my weaknesses when I’m younger, and use my strengths as I get older. People are more forgiving when you are in your 20s, than when you are in your 30s. Skill sets also evolve with time and experience. You may have more energy when you’re young, and as a result, find more value in creativity…while experience and patience when you’re older leads to better management and operational strength.

Don’t follow…find. Iterate every day and keep in mind that what you’re looking for is not tangible or finite. It is fluid. It changes. 

There are bad days and good, but after a certain amount of time (fairly variable) you will remember the moments in your journey where you felt cornered and suffocated and moments where you felt most empowered. Use those as a guiding light. Use those moments as indications of who you want to work for, who you want to help, and what you want to fix. They speak truths even you cannot admit to yourself. There is no quick fix, there is no light bulb flash. So don’t wait for it. 

Finding your passion is a long and arduous journey that is all the more fun if you value it for what it is.  

Borrowing New Year Thoughts

From my favorite blog “Cupcakes and Cashmere” - making realistic resolutions. 

“Light candles with dinner. Climb back into bed on the weekends without feeling guilty. Plan a vacation. Wear high heels to brunch with friends. Spend more time outside. Be nicer to myself. Eat breakfast for dinner. Rearrange furniture. Visit more museums. Host monthly game nights. Take cooking classes. Hear more live music. Go to the movies, if not just for the popcorn/soda/candy. Buy our first piece of art. Declutter, constantly. Plan surprise date nights. Take day trips. Speak more Spanish. Less text messages, more calls.” 

The City

There are many songs about New York and I’ve heard a lot of them. Yet, every time I hear Joe Purdy’s ‘The City’, it seems to encapsulate New York perfectly (the bad, the good, the ambiguous). The lyrics are below but you really have to listen to it to understand. 

—-

The city keeps on going…on.

Float down the river with my Iddy and Jay
Get off the boat and board a plan to JKF and I, ain’t slept a week
But it don’t seem to matter to the subway squeakers, squeak (and squeak)

The city keeps on going
We just keep on rolling
The city keeps on going
We just keep on rolling…on.

Grand Central Station and got wind they’re coming on
Independence yesterday
No one round oh and I still recognize her after all these years and she still looks the same
Ah, she still looks the same.

Oh and we end up in Brooklyn
It was rainin’ so hard
Come up all day
And the rain to clear it off,
Oh we’re just people watching on 3rd and St. Mormons
And when the girl’s kissing my face, my face
She was just kissing my face


And again, again…


Just when I was sick and lonely,
There was a shaking on the ground
We were hiding from the rain
We were riding on the train
Just when I was sick and lonely,
There was a shaking on the ground
Were were hiding from the rain
Were were riding on the train.

She was dancing on the midway
Just kissing my face
She was dancing on the midway
Just kissing my face
Dancing on the midway
Kissing my face
Dancing on the midway
Just waving goodbye.

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Election Night

Last night at the nail salon, I happened to sit next to a middle-aged man who was getting a manicure. He seemed like a frequent client because the manicurist knew all about his upcoming surgery, thanksgiving trip to Colorado, and home in Long Island. Quickly, the conversation shifted to politics. He refused to tell her who he voted for but asked, “Do you think your man is going to win tonight?” 

She answered, “Yes, I hope so.” 

She went on to say, “I don’t like Romney. He is too rich. Doesn’t seem like he would have my best interest.” 

He responded, “So what if he is rich? That means he is smart.” 

Both angles were problematic for a variety of reasons but the conversation was a microcosm of a lot of political dialogue: the less fortunate versus the fortunate (i.e. what matters to you as a result of your economic disposition), whether you can correlate success with smarts or pure luck (or whether one’s wealth should matter at all in a political race), and of course the measurement of a candidate’s “goodness” (how we measure it and how that influences our ultimate decision as a voter.)

A lot needs to change and there is a lot of work to be done but my guy won last night and for that I feel fortunate. 

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